Something must break

Holiday

Dear Emma


 

Tonight I had set my alarm to go off at 03.45 AM. It was because I wanted to share a few text messages more before my girlfriend Emma got on her flight and went on a holiday. Her going on a holiday means it’ll be more expensive to send text messages, and so we’ll try to send less of them the following week from now. I unfortunately fell a bit asleep during the text messaging. Not really weird, as I fell asleep two hours before I was waken up again. If I had slept through the whole thing up until now, it would be less than 8 hours of sleep, so I guess I haven’t been sleeping a lot tonight, since I’ve gone on my computer to write a blog post now.

 

The bad thing is, that I fell too hard to wake up again around 6 AM, so when she got on her flight, I didn’t get to tell her that I love her. I didn’t get to tell her, as I’ve always told her before, that she mustn’t die and that the flight must go well. I didn’t get to reply to her three last messages. I didn’t get to tell her the most important thing in the whole wide world to me; I didn’t get to tell her that I love her.

 

I know it’s silly of me to think this way, but I’m really sad now and having a really bad conscience about not letting her know all these things. I feel that if her plane crashes, it will be my fault in a way, and it will also be horrible to know that if that happens and if she dies, she may have thought the last minute she was alive that I didn’t care enough to stay awake and perhaps that I didn’t love her. And I DO care enough and I DO love her! But it’s easy to fall asleep when you wait for a reply.

 

She really means the world to me. Without her, I wouldn’t be here. She saved my life the day we started talking together, which we’ve done every single day for the last two and a half years (and 17 days to be precise). She’s saved my life so many times, I really don’t know where I’d be without her. I’m in tears over the thought of that I might lose her now.

 

Emma, I love you

 


Tired of being sick


image

I’m tired of being sick. I’m so fucking mad at this week having flown by with me just being sick all the time. It’s not fucking fair. I wanted my vacation last week. But no, they had to fucking have it this week, and so, I’ll still be exhausted when I return to school. This hasn’t been a time off of school, it’s been…I don’t know. I don’t like it. But there’s not a lot I can do.

I’m also tired of my mood swinging so much. I think I cry every day, and I think I smile every day as well. There’s just so many things happening all the time, and that’s really tearing me apart as well.


But I Wanna Be A Paperback Writer


Title: The BeatlesPaperback Writer

 

Yes, it’s been FOREVER since I posted, I KNOW! But it’s been Christmas, AND New Year’s, so to everyone: MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR! (Though it’s utterly delayed).

 

I’ve been reading quite a lot lately (probably because I am to be finished with my book till tomorrow, and I’ve got more than a hundred pages left), and I’m liking it. That’s so fun and exiting, but hush! Don’t tell anyone about it! Unless they wanna buy me books they don’t talk about and that might be VERY interesting to me.

 

Other than that, I’ve been busy with my favorite reason for being busy lately. I’ve been a lot with my girlfriend, AND we’ve gotten to have sleepovers, so we haven’t had to go back and forth between our places (which is kinda long, since we’re in a long distance relationship)! In addition to that, yesterday it was two years since we met, so that cause for a celebration! We celebrated the best way possible to me: in each others arms, kissing.

I love you, Emma! ❤

You’re the love of my life, baby 🙂 ❤

Personal photo, taken from a New Year’s Eve walk me and my girlfriend went on

Well, I’ll leave you with a question now then:

What’s the BEST thing (the one you got most exited about) you got for Christmas?


I’ll Have A Blue Christmas Without You


Christmas Duets

Image via Wikipedia

Title: Elvis PresleyBlue Christmas

The title is a reference to a VERY fine Christmas song. Should be heard by Elvis Presley. I think I’m in a bit of a Elvis state of mind lately, but it might just be for a couple of days, since it started last night.

Christmas is upon us, ladies and gentlemen, and I can really not wait! I’m not sure what it is I’m really waiting for, but I think what I’m most exited about is for everyone else to open their gifts from me. I hope they spread a bit of joy this year (as well as every other year). That sure would be fine.

I’m starting to get pretty annoyed with my computer being unable to load things from its DVD/CD drive. It’s so annoying! So I’m not really sure what I am to do about it, but I gotta do something, because I don’t like using Spotify to listen to music I’ve got on CD.

Later on today, my girlfriend will be headin’ out of town…her town, that is, since we’re in a long distance relationship.

That turned out to be a bit of a dead end, because I didn’t know how to continue that sentence. But anyways, I will miss her a lot, but hopefully we’ll be together a lot during this Christmas. I miss her a lot lately, and we’re having SUCH A GREAT (TREMENDOUS actually!) time together when we’re together, so I REALLY DO hope we’ll be together A LOT! I also hope she’ll come here to celebrate New Year’s Eve with me!

Well, on that note, I’ll stop pressing now. I hope you enjoyed a bit of a post, and that you comment, because I REALLY do like receiving comments!


Baby, Won’t You Keep Me Happy


A Christmas card from 1870

Image via Wikipedia

Title: The Rolling StonesHappy

 

I like that song. I generally seems to like Rolling Stones’ songs where Keith sings. Also, I generally like it when Ringo sang in The Beatles. NO IDEA why, but those songs are in a way special to me. Especially “Act Naturally” and of course: “Honey Don’t“.

 

Well, I’m TERRIBLY sorry about the VERY long posting break, but you guys didn’t seem to like my idea of “a post a day till Christmas eve“, so I quit the idea. After all, no one commented on them!

 

I’m gonna try to get better again, but most likely, I’ll be WAY worse for a while now, before getting better at this. That’s most likely because I try to stay as much out of the computer as I can from Christmas eve on. I don’t like spending time here during Christmas. I feel like Christmas should be spent with your family and those that you’re surrounded by (which hopefully will include my girlfriend quite a lot this Christmas). And then I don’t like using my computer as in a way of putting up a shield to keep others away from me. Just so you all know.

 

Of course, I’ll try my best to get in here before Christmas eve hits the gifts to wish you all a VERY merry Christmas, but until then, I won’t say it, because it’s just not Christmas completely yet, you know?

 

What’s the most special thing that’s happened to you, related to Christmas, this year?


December 13


Uploaded from : http://upload.wikimedia.org/wi...

Image via Wikipedia

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m not good at posting each day, but I’m not that motivated. After all, it doesn’t seem like anyone’s reading it anyway, so I guess I just don’t see the point.

ANYWAYS! Christmas is upon us! 11 days till Christmas eve!

 

Here’s the Christmas tree of Rockefeller:


December 9


Cover of "Joyeux Noel (Widescreen)"

Cover of Joyeux Noel (Widescreen)

Today I saw a Christmassy film about World War I. It’s called “Joyeux Noël” and I quite liked it. Liked it a lot, actually.

Well, 15 days left till Christmas eve.


December 8


Cover of "Christmas In the Heart"

Cover of Christmas In the Heart

Seems like I’m posting about every third day. It’s not on purpose. I’ve just been a lot busy or sick or haven’t been on my computer or haven’t felt like posting. But least of all the last option. It’s mainly because I haven’t been able to, though I might start using my phone for my calendar!

 

Well, today, it’s ALREADY the EIGHT of December! That’s a bit…CRAZY! It’s true as someone said in my class just the other day “When I was little, December seemed to last forever, but now, it just flies by so all too quickly”. Those are some wise words. I’ll throw in “Philosophy” as a category for this post for those words!

 

Sorry for not posting ANYTHING that’s not December related lately, but it’s important to understand that it’s soon Christmas (or some other holiday, I’m not Christian myself, so I’m not REALLY supposed to celebrate it, but hey, I’m not part of a religion that’s against other religions, and this is also tradition, so, I do as I want to!)!

 

Bob Dylan released a Christmas album called “Christmas In The Heart” (see picture in this post) last year. That title is probably not all coincidental. It’s probably been made up from the fact of that it’s not REALLY the gifts, or the food, or the music or the…whatever else that counts, it’s about CARING for others, and all that LOVE! (And about being on the height of darkness, and therefore celebrating that it’ll only be lighter and lighter each day from there on.)

 

NOT MANY DAYS LEFT! I’m a bit stressed myself, but I think I’ll do good this year as well. If just that post service would work right soon…

 

QUESTION:
Have you bought and fixed all the gifts you’re giving this year yet?


December 5


Sorry for not posting for 3d and 4th of December, but I was a bit busy.

I can’t really realize it’s less than 20 days left till Christmas eve! I can’t really believe it’s December either, though. It’s still summer outside in my head. In reality, it’s minus 15 Celsius degrees (which in Fahrenheit is…5 degrees?) when it’s on it’s warmest these days.

My baby’s in London now, and I miss her more than ever! I think she should stop by my house when she gets back from there…though it’s a bit difficult to manage, though.

Question:
Does anyone even read these posts?


December 2


Christmas-Decoration

Image via Wikipedia

GOSH DARN IT TO HELL! Is it THURSDAY already? AND is it ALREADY the second of December? Well…YEAH IT IS!

 

It’s just unbelievable!

 

NOW! Let us PRAY to the Gods of Weather, that there will be sunny and warm and melting weather the next days in the North and Western parts of Europe! ALL together now! PRAY LIKE YOU MEAN IT! We REALLY want this to happen, people, so COME ON!!!

 

Christmas is soon coming to town, and actually, IT IS already in town! I mean, look around you! There’s probably Christmas decoration EVERYWHERE you look! And still, it’s only the 2d of December today!

 

But, to quote another man of my country: “It’s not only only”, because it really isn’t just “only” 2d of December today! You see, this date is QUITE special! It is on this day TWO YEARS since I started talking to my girlfriend, and with an exception of the following Saturday from that day, we’ve talked together EVERY SINGLE DAY since! I think that’s something that can be a cause of celebration, so therefore, we do, in our own way, celebrate this lovely day!

 

It’s only 22 days left till Christmas eve now. Oh, by the way, unless noted by me, I just pick pictures from the media recommended for me, and there shouldn’t be any copy rights I’m breaking by doing so, because WordPress has told me so!

 

Who do you give presents to, besides your closest family?